Destiny Fullfillment

I am doomed to live the rest of my life by myself… If all else fails to keep from being lonely I’m gonna have to turn to the streets... I have it all planned out; Pick up a bum off the streets of Atlanta clean him up, get him tested and force him to Marry me. Just perfect. But seriously I am trying to be patient with God as he prepares the perfect Guy for me… I can be very impatient and I have no control over the situation, could it get any worse?!? I really hate dating I like the idea of having just one person to go to, to confide in, to be intimate with, ahhh you get my drift. I don’t like the idea of having a “team” it’s too much like work. I keep getting people mixed up and can’t remember who said what about what, who likes this or that, so on and so forth. When I finally find someone I’m interested it tends to be a weekly phase, 3 at the most of text messaging because nowadays people don’t know what it’s like to pick the a damn phone and converse. It’s irritating I want to hear a voice on the other end and I want to hear his reactions. That is all impossible to do through a text. It amazes me that I seem to attract older guys. I haven’t talked to anyone under the age of 27, and it puzzles me because I supposedly look like I should be in middle school or high school between the ago of 14-16 years old. Following in the footsteps of R Kelley are we? Petafile. I do not understand this! All I ask is that who ever I marry isn’t too old and still has sperm left because I would like a child or two.

-McGee

I just got some bad newz:

So it turns out "the looker", recently made a statement about how he is ready to find the one settle down and get married! Now I am totally offended by this only because like I said before I seem to be that problem child. Maybe I'm looking at it all wrong, but damn it, I want things to go my way. So here's the background. "the looker" was infatuated with me for some time. I met him on the job and we kept in touch, moreso he than me. A whole year went by with me not really caring tooo much for his texts, calls or anything, i think because I was soooo wrapped up in some other guy. (me and my Crushes)And then one day I decided to answer...I mean the first couple weeks were amazing we had great conversation, many things in common, and he was hot!! Then I feel like things took a turn for the worst..I started to like him..Lord help me..this is the point when I turn into a douche...hmm maybe that's what drives men away...I realized that when I don't care I have the natural tendency to be myself..but when I start to like them..I turn into this shy, passive, submissive, babbling fool...and they go..hmmmm this chic is wack..

One of my male friends told me that Men are naturally attracted to women who have the ability to make them better or make them feel better..like an extra backbone or something...that of course requires a strong woman...U know how in movies men fall in love with the woman that has subtle features of remembrance..like they'll say..I never met a woman with such passion, or it was her sensitivity I fell in love with and other bull shit like that...bull shit I wish I could be remembered for by the men I actually like...but let me get back to my point...so anyways I naturally assumed that the months of this conversation with the Looker would lead somewhere but it didn't..instead I realized he just wanted to chitty chitty bang bang..come on after three months that's all you want from me? Our conversations lessened and then I started to wonder why he even bothered to call..we didn't have shit to talk about..and then that stuff we had in common seemed to go out the door..then he kept trying to hit me with dumb shit..like what if i had girls on the side..or what if i had sex with someone last week..would you be mad..wtf? This is how you talk to a girl your supposedly interested in?

But anyways I tried to cut him off I told him it was over we couldn't talk anymore..at first he acted like he didn't care..and I felt good to cut him off..then he came back...trying figure out why..and basically I told him if he didn't want to be with me then there wasn't reason for us to talk..he told me I wasn't patient enough to go at his pace..so I was like sooo your pace was fast enough to be sexual (sidenote: no I didn't sleep with him) but not to go into a relationship...sooo anyways now he's talking about finding the one..and blah blah..So right now I'm upset..sooo wtf was I? I certainly don't carry myself like a cut buddy...and my douche like behavior can be overcame if a man really wants me and can bring me back to light and make me feel comfortable... I guess the hunt continues..Fu*k YOU Looker.. I'm a damn good woman..and F*ck you for not being able to see it! beanz

Problem Child

I think I have a problem. You know how all women anxiously await Mr.Right? You know how every woman wants something like Barack Obama? You know well-educated, stong, caring, with a genorous amount of swag (ugh that damn term)..I feel as though I'm stunted. Yes I want those things and more..I have a list..but when I'm presented with such a man or men...who match my list requirements..I'm become disinterested. I wonder whats wrong with me? Why isn't the fire raging inside of me? Does this mean I'm destined to be single forever because I chase what I can't have? I've also felt that maybe I'm not woman enough for certain men that have rejected me, could that be the case, I mean in regards to the men I couldn't have but wanted to have. One man told me "Oh your're such a good girl, I couldn't defile you with my ways, I'm just not a good enough man." But then again he told me: "I'm waiting for the woman that I will be consumed by, right now women are simply a game to me." So I felt like hmmm soo your saying that, I just didn't light your fire? So then it makes me wonder why didn't I? But then in the same week another man can profess his love for me and all the reasons why. This love game is funni to me! I know what I need but would perfer what I want. But don't i deserve to be passionately in love? I don't want to be with a man just because he is "GOOD" for me...I want him to be good for me..Like I am for him and also lights my passion... The hunt continues... I'm in class sooo I'll go into detail later..Beanz

Forgive them for they know not what they do:

These are our confessions:Part 1: Intro to relationships
********Disclaimer: Names have been changed to protect the rights of individuals and (assholes)... And the alias of Gentlemen X have been given to the nice guys who just happened to finish last..******


*** Since my last relationship I have dated a party promoter lets call him *the grouch, an out of state video game junkie (long distant love affair) we shall call him *Cheech and Chong, a (gentlemen X) brother, a sex addict we shall call EYEZ*, and an undercover brother we shall call BI-BI*.... -(McGee)

*** Since my last relationship I have dated a bonafide I'm just not that into type guy lets call him *love of my life, a forty year old perv *lets call him father time, an African king lets call him *Chaka Zulu, a footlocker king, lets call him *the looker and a couple of "friends" along the way...- (Beanz)


My Confessions:(Beanz)
1. I let him back in when I told him it was over...
2. I wanted to use him for his money but then I realized my own money was better
3. I cyber stalked him..every day..just to check his status and hope it was about me
4. I ignored his phone calls (all the time) I was angry with myself whenever I answered.
5. I almost let him have it...
6. I lied to myself and made myself believe that his flaws were just a phase..
7. I thought he was Mr.Right...but .....


My Confessions: (McGee)
1. I should've known he was gay
2. Only losers have bitch fits when they can't get sex... that's what grown ass men do?
3.What idiot describes to his girlfriend that the other woman is just his networking companion? (so the networking took place at Victoria' secret because that's what that picture looks like)
4. I let him go from cute and cuddly to horny and conniving.
5. He had baggage and I checked in his bags

Two Girls walk into a bar....

Most people spend their lives hopefully awaiting love, while others find it everyday in someone new...And then there are those that always wonder when they will find love or when it will find them...I think I'm different..I run from it! All of it... I can never seem to ever get my puzzle pieces to fit properly. I lose interest easily in some guys and then there are those that I love and seem to run and hide. My name is Beanz, Jewel Beanz..considerably an ideal type of woman.

Ever wonder how a date can go so well, the man can seem so right, and how wedding bells start to toll quietly in your ear? And then a week later you find out he has a wife, a deranged mentality, or a boyfriend..well i find myself asking how did I end up in this situation! My name is McGee, Trace McGee, considerably an ideal type of woman.

We decided to start this blog basically to have somewhere to vent about our conquests of love and so forth... After months...maybe years of crappy realtionships..."friendships"....horrible (sexual escapades)...or indeed beautiful ones...we find ourseleves wondering what the F@*K!?!? Searching for Mr.Right..running from Mr. Right Now...and bumping into Mr. How about it.. enough is enough..